10 Signs of Depression in Men

Content warning: There are multiple mentions of suicide in this article.

The signs of depression in men can look different than women, often influenced by societal expectations that teach boys to suppress vulnerability, show extreme self-reliance, and take risks. These norms can mask the signs of depression in men. Since men are also less likely than women to report these symptoms and face a higher suicide risk, it’s critical to know the symptoms of depression in men.

What is depression?

Depression goes beyond occasional sadness; it’s a clinical condition that can affect how you think, feel, and act. It can lead to changes in sleep, energy, concentration, and appetite, as well as feelings of sadness or hopelessness, making daily activities challenging.

10 signs of depression in men

#1 Irritability

Irritability, or a constant, underlying bitterness, is one of the most noticeable signs of depression in men. One reason for this depression symptom in men is that anger is often more socially acceptable than vulnerability. For example, while boys are discouraged from crying, lashing out in anger may be condoned.

#2 Physical complaints

The mind and body are closely connected, which is why physical depression symptoms in men are common. Men may report symptoms like sleep changes, fatigue, exhaustion, aches, and digestive issues—often unaware that these may stem from emotional distress.

#3 Isolation

Social isolation can raise the risk of depression in men. They may withdraw from others, avoiding deep conversation and interaction.

#4 Substance use

There’s a strong link between substance use and signs of depression in men. Drugs and alcohol may be used as a way to cope with painful feelings, but they often lead to more depression symptoms in men over time.

#5 Weight changes

Since depression is known to influence appetite and weight, weight loss or gain can be another sign of depression in men.

#6 Self-harm

Self-harm is sometimes a symptom of depression in men. Behaviors like cutting or burning can be expressions of internal pain.

#7 Suicidality

Men are more likely than women to complete suicide, often with a clear plan and fatal methods.

#8 Difficulty focusing

Finding it hard to work, take care of family or home responsibilities, or enjoy normal activities can be a sign of depression in men.

#9 Sexual issues

Depression in men can contribute to sexual problems like decreased libido and overall dissatisfaction with sex.

#10 Indecisiveness

Another sign of depression in men is indecisiveness. Men may struggle with decision-making due to fear of worsening their situation.

Knowing the signs of depression in men can make it easier to offer support. As a clinician, I often see depression in men when it’s reached a crisis level, but it’s much easier to help before things reach this point.

Causes of depression in men

The causes of depression in men and women are similar, but some factors can affect men more than women.

Stigma

Many men don’t get help for depression due to stigma. In many cultures, boys are socialized to be less emotional than girls. Parent and adult interactions with boys tend to focus less on identifying and sharing feelings, sending a message that men are to be strong and unemotional. This limits opportunities for men to feel and express their emotions in healthy ways, which can contribute to depression symptoms in men.

Suppressed emotions

Men often feel pressure to hide their feelings, which can increase stress, depression, and anxiety. Stoicism may mask discomfort, but it takes a toll on well-being.

Limited social support

A lack of community can contribute to symptoms of depression in men, often leading to limited interaction with family, friends, loved ones, or peers. For example, a man may isolate himself from social gatherings, avoid conversations with loved ones, or withdraw from activities he once enjoyed. On the other hand, strong social support—such as staying connected with friends, participating in group activities, or having meaningful conversations with family—can protect against both depression and suicide.

Genetics

Studies show that you’re two or three times more likely to have depression if you have a parent or sibling with depression. If you’re predisposed to depression, environmental factors can more easily trigger symptoms.

Situational factors

Stressful life events like job loss, grief, and trauma can trigger symptoms of depression in men.

Illness

Medical conditions like heart disease, Parkinson’s disease, cancer, and chronic pain can lead to depression symptoms in men or worsen existing symptoms.

Effective approaches for depression in men

For both depression in men and women, treatment typically includes counseling and/or medication. Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) focuses on actionable steps to identify core values like being a good father or employee, what you’re doing (or not doing) that represents those values, and how you can take action to make sure those values show up in your daily life.

Misconceptions about depression in men

Given the different ways men and women are socialized, there are a lot of misconceptions about the signs of depression in men. For example:

“Depression is a ‘women’s issue.’”

While 10.5% of American women are diagnosed with depression each year compared to 6.2% of men, depression in men is often underreported. These differences could be because men simply lack the words to express their emotions and are more likely to say they’re stressed or tired than depressed.

“Depression is a weakness.”

Men are more likely than women to agree with statements like, “Depression is a sign of personal weakness in men” and report more embarrassment about getting help. In reality, getting help for depression symptoms in men is courageous—each man who steps forward to seek help becomes an example for other men.

“Depression makes you a burden.”

Depression impacts your ability to care for yourself and others. Getting help makes you less of a burden on others. Take time to do the things that can help you feel better allows you to be there for yourself or your loved ones in the way you’d like to be.

“Depression isn’t a real problem.”

Depression is a serious medical condition that can significantly affect your thoughts, behaviors, and health. Signs of depression in men should be given the same attention as any other medical concern like a physical illness or injury.

How to help a man with depression

If you’re trying to support a man with depression, approach the topic with relatable language. If you say something like, “You seem sad,” or, “you look stressed,” some men may be likely to put it back on you: “That’s because I am stressed.” Try language like, “You seem kind of checked out,” or “I’m worried you’re not feeling your best.”

Normalize signs of depression in men with analogies and frame seeking help as strength. For example, maybe you point out that if you’ve injured yourself, the next step is physical therapy. Psychology is kind of like that. If your central nervous system is overstressed, you need to get to the cause of it just like an athlete would an injury: “Let’s address the pain and get you back out there.”

Depression is treatable

Getting help is a sign of strength. With the right support, you can reclaim your satisfaction in life and move forward.